Monday, November 9, 2009

Random Weirdness - Every Monday

Okay, these guys are going about this all wrong.  As any interdimensional traveler knows, you don't summon a hot woman from another dimension.  You go to another dimension and partake of the hot ladies there.  For one thing, you have a much greater selection to choose from.  You can mix and match sexual partners to your heart's content.

Second, if you're a loser in your own dimension, summoning a hot girl is not going to help unless she has amazing powers and she gives a damn about you.  Lisa from Weird Science (which is a great movie and a great TV show, as well) genuinely cared about Gary and Wyatt.  Good luck finding someone like that.  If you go to another dimension, no one knows how much you really suck, which makes this a perfect opportunity to reinvent yourself.  A nerd can totally go to any barbarian world and just tell everyone he's a sorcerer.  Whip out some techno-wizardry and the ignorant masses will throw gold, land, amd hot women at your feet.  A saavy individual could rule a world easily that way.  Hell, I've done it quite a few times.

Third, and trust me on this, you will get tired of these women.  Relationships based on nothing but tawdry, but extremely satisfying sex never last.  You'll start getting annoyed with the way she chews her food and she'll start complaining about how you "don't pull your own weight."  There's a saying I have to that extent: "Sleep around with the mortal women, but marry a goddess."  If you brought a hot woman to your dimension, only to find out that her feet smell like the ass of a bog when she takes her sabretooth tiger skin boots off, getting rid of her is going to suck.

Unless you have a way of sending her back to her own dimension, you're stuck with her.  And if you try to break it off with her, you better be ready for the violence.  Warrior women, hot cyborgs, sexy sorceresses, etc. get real pissed when you dump them.  They will wipe the floor with you.  If you travel to their dimension, however, and the women there aren't doing it for you anymore, you can just leave at any time.  This leaves you free to go to another dimension and peruse the ladyfolk there without any serious repercussions.  Just set it and forget it.

Despite these guys totally botching this up, this is an awesome video.  I especially like that hot cyborg.  I need to build me one of those and have her programmed to orgasm on command.

4 comments:

  1. Why would you want her to orgasm on command? That just seems noisy and not fun to watch.

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  2. If you have to ask, you'll never know.

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  3. Damn!! That video is a thing of beauty! And if I ever learned hypnosis, "orgasm on command" would definitely be in my repertoire.

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  4. It's nice that you think of her needs, but could you ever really know that she was orgasming rather than faking it?

    To quote some dude, If you have to ask, you'll never know.

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